So today I'm taking the subway to work like I always do and this strange squirrley looking guy gets on shorlty after I do. I take a seat and read Conan comics and he starts scratching at himself and making squeeky noises. Once he's finished scratching himself, he starts to rant...
"Ladies and gentlemen of the subway, I need to tell you a secret. You have to make sure that this secret does not leave this subway car, otherwise it won't be a secret anymore. OK? You all unnerstand me, right? OK... the secret is... you don't need to know shit. You don't need to know a damn thing and you'll be just fine."
I felt that this was a rather underwhelming secret considering the build up, but whatever. I went back to my comic book and my iPod.
The he gets weirder....
"Barrack Obama, all he wants to do is take old ideas and make you believe that they're new ideas. He shouldn't be president because he can't follow orders. John McCain, he should be president because he CAN follow orders. You know who didn't follow orders? Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy. They didn't follow orders and because of that, we replaced them. I know who replaced them. And I know that if Barrack Obama is elected, he'll get replaced to. So vote for John McCain."
After that I think he started singing the national anthem. When I got off the subway, I went to the cart across the street to get my coffee like I always do and while I was in line I saw a real, honest-to-God bearded lady. I've seen her in the area a few times.
It was kind of a weird trip to work.